Trouble at the Homefront

[Jadezfire]

So my fiancee and I are buying a house and we move in this Friday. (I cant wait because I am going to get an entertainment center and shelves to display my stuff) She is mad at me because of how much money I spend on collectors stuff and she says its all just useless crap. I told her it would be the equivelent of an art collection but she responded with you dont see me going to museums and buying all these painting do you? She also thinks I am going to have all my stuff piled up in my office/spare room and it is going to look like a hoarder lives in there...

So my question to you all is have you been in a similar prediciment and if not what would you suggest I tell her because she is worried I am going to spend all my money on this stuff and not the house, family, food, etc...

Thanks guys

[evilvort3x]

My gf hates me collecting... its my collection and I personally appreciate it so tell her to go collect more shoes etc etc :D

[twistedsymphony]

If you're spending beyond your means then your loved ones are right to feel concerned.

If you're spending responsibly and they simply feel that it's a waste of money then THEY need to understand that it's a hobby of yours, you're not going to change, and they should deal with it or move on.

My wife thinks my collecting games is silly and she doesn't understand it, but she's never once told me to stop or told me that I should be spending my money differently.

The amount of money I spend on my game collecting is peanuts compared to what I spend on car parts upgrading and modifying my cars, she's never once told me to stop that hobby or not spend money on that either.

She understands that these hobbies are part of who I am, and that I enjoy doing these things. That's enough reason for her to respect these things as much as I do.

It works both ways too, I personally think that a lot of things she spend money on is silly and wasteful, but I know it brings her joy... and that's whats important.


We only have one life, and you spend most of it working for other people, if you can do what makes you happy in your free-time then what's the point...

[scottcross]

My GF knew what she was letting herself in for when we got together so moving in together wasnt a big deal as she knew my collection was coming with me and she let me have the basement for myself, and as for convincing her you wont spend all your money on collecting, you need to convince yourself your not going to spend over your means first. If you have always watched what you have spent on collecting then she should already know this it will just be a case of reinforcing it to her.

[Jadezfire]

Thanks guys! Yeah for the most part I budget out what I want to spend a month and every once in a while I might go a little over but thats normally around my birthday, christmas or something like that. Im hoping its just that shes nervous about us buying a house and worried we wont be able to furnish it completely etc, but I hope when she sees all the stuff im buying for us and the house she will be ok!

[bbki]

My equation is easy
One of her bag/purse = my entire month (or two) of collection
So no matter how much I spend I can never top her in a single purchase.
but still...all my shit still in the mailing box and never come out of the attic tho

Also build a secret compartment that she didn't know before you move in
that'd work too...(for me)

[scottcross]

Thanks guys! Yeah for the most part I budget out what I want to spend a month and every once in a while I might go a little over but thats normally around my birthday, christmas or something like that. Im hoping its just that shes nervous about us buying a house and worried we wont be able to furnish it completely etc, but I hope when she sees all the stuff im buying for us and the house she will be ok!

Your right she probably is nervous, when I first moved in with my girlfriend it wasnt easy adjusting, put it this way we moved in to the house in november and I was back out by february lol, things worked out in the end though and we now much better and we now have an insane 9 month old boy, who i'm going to try and convince to collect as well :)

[Jadezfire]

Haha thats funny BBKI!

Scott I am sure your son will be a collector too, video games are just too awesome!

[mosavon]

My equation is easy
One of her bag/purse = my entire month (or two) of collection
So no matter how much I spend I can never top her in a single purchase.
but still...all my shit still in the mailing box and never come out of the attic tho

Also build a secret compartment that she didn't know before you move in
that'd work too...(for me)
duplicate :(

[mosavon]

My equation is easy
One of her bag/purse = my entire month (or two) of collection
So no matter how much I spend I can never top her in a single purchase.
but still...all my shit still in the mailing box and never come out of the attic tho

Also build a secret compartment that she didn't know before you move in
that'd work too...(for me)
If it all gets a bit heated and she finds the panic room i'll take some of those boxes back no problem :2cool:

[HIPPEEDUDE]

Personally,i think shes just a bit worried thats all. Your collection just haapens to be the first thing that comes to mind. Shes just worried about the whole house thing,its a big step & shes simply worried if its going to all blow up,if this is the right thing to do,can we afford it all the usual arguements/points that can be made. All these fears will diminish when you move in & things go reasonably smoothly. At the end of the day surely she knew what you were like to begin with,if your buying a house together collecting has obviously been accepted so all this worry & stress is just her overly worrying about it all. All you can do is tell her its going to work beforehand & when you move show it works

[Saturn]

I don't have a GF but my family is already used to it and in a kind of way they support me. Even my 9 yo cousin who visits the house regularly already knows a couple of things about collecting.

Almost every other guy I know who collects seriously doesn't have much trouble with that, except maybe for one. Where do they find these girls is out of my league...

[Jadezfire]

Personally,i think shes just a bit worried thats all. Your collection just haapens to be the first thing that comes to mind. Shes just worried about the whole house thing,its a big step & shes simply worried if its going to all blow up,if this is the right thing to do,can we afford it all the usual arguements/points that can be made. All these fears will diminish when you move in & things go reasonably smoothly. At the end of the day surely she knew what you were like to begin with,if your buying a house together collecting has obviously been accepted so all this worry & stress is just her overly worrying about it all. All you can do is tell her its going to work beforehand & when you move show it works

Thanks HIPPEEDUDE! Yeah she knew what I was like before hand because I have collected movie props and magic cards lol in the past. I havnt been collecting video game stuff for to long now but thats only because i really didnt know there were as many collector and special edtions as there are until I preordered MW3 Hardened. I also bought her a portal gun because she loves that game, then maybe she will realize how cool the stuff is lol

[Jadezfire]

I don't have a GF but my family is already used to it and in a kind of way they support me. Even my 9 yo cousin who visits the house regularly already knows a couple of things about collecting.

Almost every other guy I know who collects seriously doesn't have much trouble with that, except maybe for one. Where do they find these girls is out of my league...

Thats good! My Dad is actually the same way as me, he buys a ton of stuff offline he collects a lot of books and WW2 photographs, journals etc. Pretty cool stuff actually but I think I got the collecting gene from him hehe

[BigMike382]

Imagine if you were a gun collector or restoring an old car, u would be spending way way more. To me its a much cheaper hobby then the standard ones these days. And lets be honest most people like to collect something. I have a friend who buys guns from time to time, and he spend 10x more then what i do. Reminds me what i spend is not nearly as much as what most folks spend on that or there cars. My ex was the same way with my hobby, she just eventually will have to accept that is something you really enjoy.